there's nothing wrong with the may/december romance, but just for fun let's do the math, shall we? i have a daughter who is 4 years old. there's some kid out there who just got his driver's license today who's waiting for her to grow up so he can boink her. my husband has a shotgun and i am pretty handy with a shovel...
:)

It's a double standard. Trust your instincts, not what people tell you is right.

it doesn't sound creepy to me. Maybe because I was married at 19???

it just begs the question: how old *were* the girls you fooled around with when you were 19? if you extrapolate from your current situation, it sounds a bit suspect. i'm hoping you'll come back with a story about a 35-year-old woman who took you under her wing and schooled you in the art of boinking.

When I was 19 I had a sordid romance with someone 20 years my senior (my high school wrestling coach no less!) while I worked at a bible camp. It was hot. No regrets. I was completely capable of making a sound decision to do him at that age - either his or mine.

Now that I'm 33 and work at a university, I'm starting to get all these Nabukovian ideas in my head...what comes around goes around I guess.

You Go Girl.

There is nothing wrong with an adult hooking up with an another adult no matter what the age. Nineteen year olds are hot. Everyone knows this. Everyone protesting is jealous.

this is why i love Amsterdam.

It really depends on the parties involved. 19-year-olds can be incredibly mature or very irresponsible; so can 39-year-old men.

As a 19 yr old, I always had propositions from older men, but most were just horny old dogs who weren't interested in anything besides a one-nighter and a boost to their ailing egos. What would be in it for me? A long-term relationship? a mentorship? love and tenderness? Not hardly, and those were the things I needed most at that age while I was still gaining the sea-legs of adulthood.

Now? I have no need of that, already had it, very much under my own power and quite confident about myself. A one-nighter would be no threat to my personhood -- that's the big difference between 19-year-old women and those decades older.

You prepared to be a daddy-figure to a late teenager, oh Mighty One?

If you're worried about what people think, get out now. It's a no-win. As the older party and a man (Double whammy), you'll be held responsible for everything. There's just no way to escape the "She didn't know any better but you should have." mentality. However, if you take the quite reasonable approach that adults (Including 19yr olds) are responsible for their actions, then laissez le bon temps rouler.

I have 9 years on my husband. When I met him he was in his 20s. We'll be married 12 years in February. Screw everyone else.

Less than 15 years age difference? That's nothing if you're both adults. Try 25 years difference. Or 50, like Tony Randall.

My wife is 8 years older than me. No big whoop.

Jim, you're about the 8th guy in his early 30's that I know who has dated a 19 year old. Not an 18 year old, not a 21 year old - 19 on the nose. It's a right of passage, bud.

I've heard a great test for determining the youngest person you should date. Divide your age in half and add 7. Round down if you must. ;)

Age is just a number, that's what I say. As long as she is over 18.

And women don't always get off easy, you know. My ex-boyfriend was five years younger than me, and all my friends thought I was insane. They didn't understand why I didn't want to date 40-year-olds like they were. No offense to 40-year-olds, of course.

Although I do have to admit it did suck when he couldn't get into bars or when I had to buy beer for him. I was very happy when he turned 21.

Jim, you were'not hooking up with 19-year-olds when you were 19 because you were busy with the younger ladies--the 9-year-olds. You know, keeping the gap alive. I certainly remember those good times.

You're hanging out with the wrong people, my friend. You woulda gotten high-fives around these parts. This is your new anthem.

Although I seriously question the maturity of anyone under 23 these days... they all seem to be so vapid... maybe it's something with being born in the 80's? I dunno if I'd get into a relationship with anyone that young... but a hot romp in the sack a few times? Sign. Me. Up.

I wholeheartedly agree with Mia. Most of the 19 year olds I encounter can barely spell their last name.

Jimbo, it's not the age - it's the miles.

I totally think you should hit it. 19 year olds are hot hot action.

Hmmm..I can't really point fingers...I educated a 19 year old when I was about 30. My ex-husband is 7 years older. But I come from a long line of cradle-robbers, so I can't really be blamed for my actions...it's genetics. ;)

Well, that's weird. I thought Jim was like forty.

When I was 19, I married a 34-year old man. My boss gave him a high five. I hereby pass on that high five to you, my friend.

Also, one of my neighbors is like 31 and she has an 18 year old girlfriend. So don't sweat it, sugar. Dating the young 'uns is all the rage these days.

On behalf of 32 year old males everywhere, congratulations…or something a little more p.c.

If you don’t mind me asking, which came first, the pallet of condoms from Sam’s Club or the prospective hottie? I may need to rethink my strategy...

I second Noggie's comment!

Hey, it's all good...I never hooked up with 19 year olds when I was 19, either. I was too busy hooking up with guys your age. *laughs*

However, in another 6 or 7 years, I think I'll be happily chasing the 19 year-olds. It's just how the system is supposed to work! :P

*~ Alayna

Jim was that you lurking about in my dorm room hall last night? Sorry we called the cops on you. We thought you were going to flash us like that hobo last week. Did you take our dry erase pens? if you did, can you return them please? We're so poor, my roommate and I can't scrape together the 96 cents to buy a new one. We tried to duct tape a string to an eyeliner, but well, we needed the eyeliner so we could vamp up the eyes to get into a club for free.

P.S. could you buy us some beer? My roommate will make out with you, after she drinks a few of course.

I had a flirtation not long ago (I'm 31) with an 18 year old on a movie set.
I didn't take it past that because it felt inapropriate. It might have felt better if he were 21, or maybe just a more mature 18, but I don't know.
If you feel wrong about it, it's wrong.
If you feel right about it, see her as an adult, and respect her opinions and feelings, then it's right.
And yes, younger people tend to be hotter, it sucks.
-D

Honestly, I haven't met the 19 year old man I'd like to do. That's true now, it was true when I was 30, and when I was 25, and when I was 19, and when I was 15. Men are much hotter at 35 than they are at 19; I see that as a fact. And for the record, I don't applaud the Demi/Doofus thing -- I think she's a control freak who enjoys a partner who's LESS THAN she is. What's sexy about that?

I've never dated a man under 25 -- in my entire life -- so there has to be something to the older guys/younger girls dynamic. It's not hard to understand the attraction either way.

However! As regards young=hot, I'm not so sure I agree. Without a doubt, it's true that I LOOKED better at 19 than I do now, but to be honest, I looked better at 35 than I EVER have. And I'm "hotter" today than I've ever been. Maybe not as regards physical appearance, but certainly where/when it counts.

I wouldn't mind doing it all over again, though. It sure was fun. :-)