Smack.
I kicked the habit years ago. Therapy. Intervention. The withdrawls. Parched. Dry. Bleeding. Tormented.
I had been clean for years. I thought I would be clean forever. I thought I could make it. But when I needed a little something to get me by one Saturday, and that was all they had, I gave in.
Sure. I thought I could manage. I could control it. I didn't have a problem. Just a little on the weekends. You know, for kicks. God, I loved how it burned. I loved that tingle.
But then I started keeping some at my desk. I was using at work. A little more in the afternoon. I told myself it was only when I really needed it. Finally I was reaching for it first thing in the morning. And soon I didnt even know when I was using. I can't stop, and frankly, I don't want to.
Goddamit, how I need some now.
If I had only known, I never would have tried it the first time back in college. If I had only known how it would gain control over my life. I can't go anywhere without it. I cant function.
I'm licking my lips. I'm in trouble. I...I have a problem.
I am a Carmex abuser. And I need help.



Comments
dude. i'm addicted to chapstick (tm). i have the same problem. i wonder if there is a 12 step group for us? maybe if we just make out a lot...no need...
it'd be a nasty withdrawal...chapped bleeding lips...for weeks...blech, let's just stay hooked. :P~
Posted by: tassy | April 22, 2004 02:47 AM
I think they put some kind of crack in that stuff. I'm a burt's bees lip balm addict myself.
Posted by: liz | April 22, 2004 06:26 AM
I feel your pain. I am addicted to lip balm(s), and to foot lotion. I wake up desperately needing both about twice a night. All I can say is my husband is a very patient man.
And, btw, they've actually proven lip balms are addictive. Something about them causes your lips to stop producing their own natural moisture or something.
Posted by: Shawn | April 22, 2004 06:53 AM
Actually, they DO put a form of crack in most commercial crapsticks -- check the ingrediants. If you see any kind of alcohol (as you will in Chapstick brand lip balm), then the stuff is actually DRYING YOUR LIPS OUT ... so that you have to use more.
I highly recommend switching from a petroleum/alcohol based lip treatment (ie Chapstick and Carmex) to one based on more natural oils like beeswax and olive oil (like Burt's Bees). Because seriously: that stuff feels like crack for a reason. That alcohol ensures that you're a repeat customer!
[This post brought to you by the chapstick conspiracy theorist who only uses Burt's Bees and other "hippy"-style lip balms]
Posted by: Ariel | April 22, 2004 07:28 AM
Ditto to Burt's Bees. And my new obsession: The Body Shop Lip Butter. Mmmmmm papaya.
Posted by: Amy | April 22, 2004 09:31 AM
Dude, I switched to Savex back in highschool, which was a minor improvement, but am now on Burt's Bees. I prefer the one in the tube, but have gone to the little tin because I keep it in my pocket. The tube-style gets too soft and breaks off, wasting $3. I think Burt's Bees might be the methadone of lip balm.
Posted by: jake | April 22, 2004 10:02 AM
Badger Balm!
Posted by: Noggie | April 22, 2004 11:10 AM
Re: The Body Shop lip butters...are the flavors actually noticeable? I've tried Body Shop lip balms before, and their "flavors" never tasted like anything.
I also love Burt's Bees, but my main problem with them is that the only lip balm they make that has sunscreen is zinc oxide, like the white stuff beach lifeguards put on their noses (which obviously just won't do). I'm a fanatic about sunscreen, so I usually end up using Blistex Herbal Answer during the day. It has SPF 15, and doesn't seem to have the same addictive effect that Chapstick has (I usually only use it once or twice during the day, and my lips are fine).
Posted by: Tina | April 22, 2004 03:27 PM
Get a grip and just stop using the crap. Anything is possible if you want to achieve success. You never believed me when I said it was a habit. What's that expression "Mother Knows Best"
Posted by: The Big Mama | April 22, 2004 06:43 PM
Ha! I love this. Where was our moral compass (Nancy Reagan) to steer us away from the perils of chapstick use during the 80's?
You have so few vices, keep spreadin' that crap on yourself, Jimbo. You're not going to live forever -- might as well have smooth and well attended to lips.
Posted by: J i m (kaya) | April 23, 2004 07:26 AM
ya know, i'm not sure i like the idea of my mother commenting on, let alone READING this site.
i can think of more than a few entries where, really, it would be in both our best interests to stay in blissful ignorance.
you all just KNOW this is gonna bite me in the ass.
Posted by: the mighty jimbo | April 23, 2004 09:55 AM
Aw, honey I've got just the methodone you need:
Burt's Bees Beeswax Lip Balm.
Much better, sweeter tingle. Comes in a little tub or a stick.
Or you can just kiss it off, if you want
*smacks lips*
Posted by: bridget | April 23, 2004 01:09 PM
two words: Burt's Bees. But they've been said a myriad times. It's great to see so many disciples of Burt out there. Can't beat Burt. If this wasn't a sign from the gods that it's time for you to switch, i don't know what is!
Posted by: heavyfeather | April 23, 2004 08:29 PM
LOL. I'm also addicted to lip balm, mainly Carmex and Smith's Rosebud Salve. Kiehl's baby lip balm (in the tube) is also a good one.
Burt's Bees doesn't do it for me. It actually makes my lips feel drier.
Posted by: dawn | April 26, 2004 01:28 PM
This whole post is too funny! You actually had me going on the smack addiction for a while - I waslike "hmmm,hope that doesn't happen to me, my drug addiction's just for kicks on the weekend isn't it?" Then you hit us with the carmex habit. Very clever.
Also, I am a carmex addict myself. I have often wondered how most of my guy friends get by without lip balm. They just don't use it, whereas I need it every couple of hours. I keep saying "don't you need some lip balm?" and they're like "...No!"
I'm from Australia and we don't have Burt's Bees. Damn!!
Posted by: Jesscat | May 15, 2004 09:02 AM
There's only 1 thing better than Carmex, and that's Natural Ice. It burns 3X more than Carmex! Also comes in a variety of flavours, is bees-wax based, is SPF 15, and comes in a stick. It's made by the good people at Mentholatum, but seems to only be on sale in Canada. So next time you're up that way drop in to the nearest drug store. Well worth the $3. I stock up on the stuff every year when I'm back now that I live in Australia.
Down here there's Carmex which I switched back to due to the lack of Natural Ice.
Recently however I've come across Savex, which seems like a decent offering. Similar sensation to Carmex, better taste, and includes sunscreen (a definite must in Australia).
But I still can't wait til I get my hands on more Natural Ice! Mmmm.. That 'natural' icy burning feeling...
Posted by: Stormin_ | June 30, 2004 09:51 PM
why don't you try ordering it from an online website, or drugstore website?
Posted by: KC | October 16, 2004 12:46 AM