you're getting closer every single day now. go with it. first, the blow off. second, the sabbatical. third, the obvious change in temperature around TMJ the past 36 hours. you're on the brink, my brother. you've got it in you - and you want to let it out.

we all want you to let it out. sometimes you just have to say what the fuck... joel, get off the babysitter... but to clarify, my position is that you're just 2 gin & tonics and 1 drunk bitch away from pulling off the 180. you're very close. and you need this. and the penis of the tiger will make your oddysey that much more entertaining for the rest of us. Via con dios.

www.thepenisofthetiger.com

I must say that I've known you for many years and I agree COMPLETELY with Sean. I was just too chicken to say it. Go for it....you'll be much happier!

"women like two things in life: problems and shopping"..."I don’t give them enough of a headache. I give them nothing to fix".

1. Not all women like problems and shopping.

2. Is that what you want, a women who will "fix" and change you? I know you only through what you write but it sounds like you want someone to accept you for who you are. Find that person. Please don't be jaded, life's too short.

Ah, but Stella, life is also too short to watch everyone around you gettin' some while you're not.

Sometimes you remind me all too much of myself about 6 years ago. No advice or words of wisdom really. Well, ok, I feel I should say one....Follow your heart. Damn, how cliche can I be?

ok. so after 24 hours, the only woman who disagrees is stella - who you weren't going to hook up with anyway. we're all on your side.

now go out this weekend with a straight, male friend. dress nice, but tap the brakes a bit on Queer Eye For The Straight Guy. Show up a little drunk already, and let the game come to you. you're there. welcome back, jimbo. welcome back.

Well, if no one else of my gender is going to step up to the plate... I second Stella. I do not care for either shopping or problems. I much prefer cameras and computers.

I don't have any bright words of wisdom for you on how to find someone who is not a ditz, though. I think part of it might be looking in the right places and the rest pure luck.

You are not alone, either. My brother lives in Huntington Beach and is also trying to find someone who is not a complete Barbie. Good luck and good hunting.

SEAN?

I you. Though you probably won't me now that my hair is up in a scrunchy and I have a baby slung on my hip and am lookin' pretty trashy in a Wisconsin girl kinda way... Maybe a little butter will help get this band off my finger. Once, SEAN. Once.

What happened to my *HEART*(s)?
I *HEART* you damn it! I *HEART* you!

Nothing screams masculinity like a henna tattoo.

Yeah I've got the same problem. If I hear "Sean's my favorite girlfriend!!" one more time I'm going to...um...do something. There should be a military-style boot camp where guys could spend a week screaming degrading things at female dummies, shooting helpless animals and not shaving our chest hair.

See? There's always a reference to you getting it in the ass. I think I'm onto something here...

P.S. I'm back.

Hmmm... Jimbo, you are sounding awfully cynical lately. "Treat me like a John and you’re welcome to be my whore." ...uh, Yikes?

What's up? Seriously? Perhaps its those few CA girls that make a bad name for everyone else (including the normal, sweet CA girls)? My take: You need a change guy. Some different scenery, some new blood.

Heck, you know Vancouver is beautiful at this time of year... Take some time and slap some skis on!

Ok you got me on the shopping thing. But I dont like men with problems. I actually just got out of a 8 years relationship, because he always had problems. And I dont do drama either. So we are not all the same.

8 years seems like a lot of time to begrudgingly spend with those problems... especially if you don't like men with problems. (see, jimbo - it bought that dude 8 years)

*hearts* to xdm. you're gold.

off to kill santa claus for the good of the land

I'm sorry, I just got My Horny back and I couldn't concentrate after reading "Hot lesbians making out by the punch bowl"

Damn it, I wish there was a button to turn the horny off, because it's starting to interfere with my listening skills. Like, see how I made this about me? (Well, actually about My Horny, but still...)

I'm going to stick up for my own kind here and say that we are not all up for problems and shopping. Frankly, I can't stand shopping. I'd rather just surf online and have whatever I want sent directly to me. Malls are crap....and for the most part, so are men. You all SAY that you are looking for more than a Barbie, but really, you wouldn't be caught dead with a girl who didn't resemble that of a Victoria's secret model. I lived in OC for 29 years and let me tell you, the men there want the perfect physical woman, but not one who can actually challenge and entice your intellect. I've had a enough tauntings from the surfer boys at Salt Creek beach to know better. And I'm a size 6!!!! How impractical are you guys anyway? Don't you realize that for a person to become the beauty that you drool over, they generally have to become extrordinarily self-centered...and probably at least a little bit plastic? I'm tired of all the whining from your kind. Seriously, the person you want is right in front of you. You guys are just so entrenched in the pit of T&A that you'll never reach the peak of soul mate. So...good luck finding "the one". You obviously are gonna need it.....

Apparently I need to defend myself when posting. My ex boyfriend of 8 years didnt have all these problems when I started dating him. We had over 5 very happy years together. I dont mean problems like being a drug addict or shoplifting. And I stuck with him because I loved him, and I wouldnt leave any of my friends when the chips are down. Maybe losing his business caused him to go into a downward spiral, and as hard as I tried I couldnt watch as he refused to get professional help, and allowed this to consume him.

1) Stop making generalizations. I despise shopping. And I care even less for drama, the kind that "problems" bring. 2) Can you discuss foreign, economic and energy policy, literature, fusion cooking? Maybe you ought to be trying harder to find the women that can do that -- instead of hanging with girls who shop. 3) Get the hell out of SoCal. Aren't you packing already? 4) Stop hanging with Sean. Non-shopping/non-problematic women won't waste a second on him. I know I can smell his kind at several kilometers; the stink turns on my full-bitch mode. Is that what you want for yourself? 5) And stop whining. You get what you choose and you keep choosing the same thing; try changing the choice. Crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Jimbo, if you were a business, what do you think the shareholders would say? Now git. There's a plane with your name on it.

sorry rayne. i disagree. generalizations are how we organize our view of the world and it's the source of most of our humor. generalizations are fine. prejudices are not. nobody said generalizations apply to everyone, just many. and the girls i'm attracted to do not fit those generalizations. what i'm saying is that when the majority of women DO fit those generalizations, relationships become difficult.

and although you all are more than welcome to bitch about sean, be careful about your assumptions about the women who are attracted to him. he's been married to my sister for almost a decade. and i'll go to the wall for anyone with my last name. and for sean. he is a a crazy bud light drinking republican, but he still rules.

"A little less talk and a little more cock."

ROCK!

Generalizations, schmeneralizations. How many of the women in this thread said they hated shopping?

I could make my own generalizations based on what you've written this last couple of weeks. It's not about companionship or love, it's just about sex and frequency thereof for men, and they'll mooch up to women to get it while denigrating them behind their backs. It's all about the little head thinking for the big head. Is that true too? Is that an accurate and healthy way to organize my world view?

Maybe the big head ought to start thinking about its calling in life, its dharma, instead of letting the little head do all the thinking and talking.

There is nothing wrong with a little head now and then.

Right on, Razor! To clarify, neither I nor TMJ made any generalizations at all regarding physical caliber of female. That's irrelevant. He has been immersed in a process that isn't working for him, and I have been offering alternative lines of thought that may (or may not) help him find a home for both his little and big head... No mention at all of barbie doll sex, underwear models, or Salma Hayek. Jimbo simply needs a little swagger to back up his dagger. No harm in that.

And if talking foreign economic and energy policies with a romantic interest doesn't make you flacid, I don't have the slightest clue what would. OK, maybe literature, fusion cooking, and women who refuse to admit that they adore shopping and men they can't fix.

i hate bing crosby

My humble two cents on TMJ's situation: He is too picky.

You are never going to find a barbie body (don't even argue with me, you always go for the size 3 or below) with a liberal vegetarian einstein mind that can also climb 5.11 and wants sincerely wants to live out of a dirt hole backpack for a few months (and has the financial resources to do it). I applaud your for keeping up the search though.

oh ye of little faith.

i'm just not gonna find her in OC. but she is out there. oh yes.

Damn. I missed a frisky discussion. I just have ONE QUESTION for The Mighty Jimbo ...

What about Tassy?

I'm bummed to have missed out on this discussion too.

You can guess how much I agree with Sean there. :p

Guys who treat women like shit wind up with women who will put up with being treated like shit. You like a woman with self-respect and a backbone. =)

So let's make the 'ideal' list. Everyone has one. Comeon, I'm sure your readership wants to know.

In no particular order, I'm designing the jimbo chick:

1)No luggage or at least only a small carry on. Kids and psycho ex's do not qualify as a carry on. TMJ travels light.

2) Hot. OK, let's be politically correct and say 'fit'. But I know a body like an aerobics instructor is in the 'ideal' list somewhere.

3) Socially liberal and fiscially conservative.

4) Loves veggies.

5) Fairly brainy and in touch with the world; able to hold a conversation on anything that might appear in this blog (thought I'd narrow it down a bit, eh?) which seems to run from S&M and latex to children in ceiling fans to foreign policy.

6) Solid 5.11+ climber. And Mt. Bike rider, and waterskiier, and .....

7) Sufficiently financially resourced to live out of a dirt backpack for an extended period travelling the world. I'm sure TMJ would sponsor the right girl, but the ideal girl would hold her own; we have already seen financial dependence leads to downhill relationships (I'll stop there).

8) Truly desires to live out of a dirt backpack in various countries around the world, not just thinks it is a cool idea. Enough to actually make it happen. These are different things. Needless to say, comfortable with no nails, no hairdryers....

9) Thinks a shiny lid is cool.

10) Backbone. Enough to tell TMJ to shut the @#$! up and do what she told him to 10 minutes ago.

11) Fashion sense. If you have read any of this blog, you know TMJ is the fashion nazi. Nothing like a good man-blouse.

Anyone care to add more?