Saturday, May 11, 2002
A good friend visited me recently, hurt and heartbroken from an unrequited love. I've been there - more than once. I know how that feels. I've been reckless with my own heart. She took the leap, left herself unguarded and subsequently took the fall. I admire her for taking that risk. I think it's a risk we have to take to live fully and completely. It took courage, and it left her vulnerable. But only with the greatest risks come the greatest rewards. Without taking that risk, she would be left not with hope, but merely with desire. The greatest loves, the most lasting rewards are from those of us who are courageous and generous with our hearts. I'm still learning how to live that way.
Jim Parisi
Friday, May 10, 2002
Shit! My post idea for the day got bogarted by Kaya! I had been working on a story about the warnings they announce during commercials for prescription drugs. You know, "side effects similar to sugar pill and include nausea, dizziness, dry mouth and nose bleeds". Nose bleeds? Just how big was that sugar pill and what did they do with it during the clinical trials? Hit the patient over the head? I was gonna post a nice little blog about it, but he posted the same rant before I did! And he did it better than me! Talented little bastard. Speedy too. I'm stewing in my own sense of inadequacy.
"Claritin is not for everyone. Possible side effects include nausea, dwarfism, sluggishness and searing genital pains." Dwarfism. Heh. Dammit that's funny. Kaya you rock.
Jim Parisi
Thursday, May 09, 2002
I want to continue this rant. I'm feeling particularly self-righteous today. This is a message for all the people who buy exercise products from infomercials. You see those models in the commercials? The guys with the tan, rock hard abs and the massive chest? The ladies with the tight, round buttocks and the big silicone filled boobies? Yes, genetics and surgery had something to do with that. But beyond that, do you think those abs came from 5 minutes a day, three days a week hooked up to a couple D Cell batteries? It took YEARS of training for HOURS every day. Just like every athlete, a body like that takes work. Look, I HAVE great abs, a tight butt, and a Bowflex chest (he writes with just a touch of arrogance). Wanna know how I got it? About fifteen years of training four to six days a week for two or more hours a day. That and an equal number of years on a low fat, high veggie, high protein diet. And the second I stop, it all goes bye bye. Three days a week on an Ab-Rocker won't make you look like clone of Denise Richards after a lifetime of Nutty Ho-Hos, Meat Lover's Pizzas, and Big Gulps. Do you just want a nice, healthy life? Slim down? Tone up? Just eat right and exercise. That's it. Want to look like a Baywatch cast member? Get ready for muscle pulls, ibuprofen, and a whole helluva lot of sweating. And probably a visit from the silicone fairy. There. I'm finished now. I'll put my official Jack Lalane pedestal away now and will return to nice, healthy, self-depreciating humor.
Jim Parisi
Wednesday, May 08, 2002
Have you seen the adverts for drinks like the Hollywood Diet? Drink this bottle of juice and lose up to ten pounds in two days. Am I the only person absolutely terrified of any product capable of making a person drop ten pounds in two days? If I dropped ten pounds in two days I'd want to be rushed to the hospital. The only weight most people could drop that fast is water. Period. Are there people out there so dumb and so desperate that they buy this stuff? Of course it's gonna cause you to drop ten pounds - you don't eat for two days while you are on it! How about those machines that give you electric shocks to contract your muscles while you sit and watch Oprah and eat Cheetohs. More crap. Here's an idea, let's channel electric current to our torsos. You know, where your heart is. Besides, the contraction created isn't strong enough to build muscle. Ever. Another brilliant idea for the intellectually challenged. Nothing infuriates me more than useless products that pander to people so desperate about their appearance that they look for a two day, $25 fix for a lifetime of lifestyle problems. Kids, it just aint that easy.
Jim Parisi
I added some new pics to the site. Photos from Scottsdale, Palm Springs, Joshua Tree, and some typical local tomfoolery. Enjoy.
Jim Parisi
Tuesday, May 07, 2002
"They say every man in Brazil has at least nine girlfriends. My question is, Where are my other seven?" - from a popular joke in Rio.
Jim Parisi
So the theme in my two recent posts: activities I'm embarrassed to admit. So let's run with it a little further. Have you ever noticed the similarities between comic book heroines and porn stars? It's true! Pick up your latest version of X-Men (could the title be any more appropriate) and take a look at how the women are drawn. They have bodily proportions that would make a Barbie Doll gasp, they wear virtually no clothing at all, they constantly find themselves in seductive, albeit contorted positions, and they always forsake their given name for a single pseudonym. Rogue! Phoenix! Vampirella! And let's not forget all those amazing things they can do with their bodies. Now take a look at today's porn stars. They too have ridiculous proportions that would make a Barbie Doll gasp, wear virtually no clothing at all, constantly find themselves in seductive, albeit contorted positions, and they also always forsake their given name for a single pseudonym. Jenna! Janine! Savannah! And I don't need to mention all the amazing things they can do with their bodies. There is of course an obvious reason for this. Have you ever been to a comic book store? Take a good long look at your average X-Men fanboy and you will get a pretty good idea as to how often he is getting laid.
Jim Parisi
Monday, May 06, 2002
I'm taking a bit of heat about my recent story, Sex, Drugs, and Bunny Rabbits, both for being in the situation and, secondly, choosing to write about it. But I stand by my decisions. I find no fault in my decision to go to this party, or even socializing (initially) with a drug user. I won't be that hypocrite. The story is about two themes. To report on a social situation that most people have never experienced, and to comment on what it feels like to come face to face with the consequences of bad behavior. So lets look at what really happened, I attended a high brow social function, I kissed a drug addict, after she did drugs. I left her after realizing I couldn't help her after all (and after realizing she really had no interest in me), and I slept in my car. I did nothing wrong other than violate my own personal moral code. I paid the price for that. And I shared that story. And I also accept those consequences. If I am serious in my attempt to be a memoirist, I have to be willing to accept and share all of myself, good and bad, in print. And if you want to accept me, you too have to accept all of me.
Jim Parisi
Spiderman was really friggin cool. Great love story. And the best comic book movie since Batman. I don't usually like to admit this, but I used to be a full fledged fan-boy. A comic book geek. I got a closet full of the stuff. I gave it up in about 96, but deep down I still dig the art form. I usually cringe at the cinematic adeptations of comic books. But this time, they got it right. Stan Lee should be proud.
Jim Parisi
Sunday, May 05, 2002
Do you have any friends with an MD? I do. I have known her for geez - getting close to 20 years. Man, has it been that long? Anyway, I have noticed when I get together with her and the rest of my old high school buddies, the conversation almost always turns to sports injuries, medical ailments, family illnesses, and if the ER is really like, well, ER. We may not have all been in the same room together for half a decade, but if we all go to dinner, inevitibly she will spend half the night answering our questions as to us how a rotator cuff works, what that discharge really means, why she doesn't get grossed out during a prostate exam, and all about the gunshot wound to the testicle she had to treat last week. I figured she would get bored of this, but I have gone to dinner parties with her where I was the only one there *without* an MD. And guess what? The only thing THEY talk about is medicine. And occasionally why managed care sucks. I suppose eight years of college and four+ years of residency carve really, really deep grooves into brain matter, but she could probably explain to me why that analogy is incorrect.
Jim Parisi
