Wednesday, July 24, 2002
I still can't get my head around this "where to buy rock and roll spandex pants" query. I soooo want to add that phrase to the title of my site. Digital Catharsis : Where to buy rock and roll spandex pants. I didn't know there was still a market for those things. Then again, David Lee Roth is touring this year. David? Was that you on the site? Oooh! If were lucky we might even get Y&T, Autograph, and WASP to tour again. This could be my ticket to e-commerce independence.
A second thought about spandex pants. In the late 80's, the booming rock climbing community began to wear those same obnoxious spandex pants. Became a climbing fashion statement. All the old magazines have pictures of these skinny, hairy dudes clinging to rock walls in pink spandex. I thank God that I didn't discover climbing until the 90s. Photos of my skinny ass in pink Spandex would haunt me for decades.
Jim Parisi
Tuesday, July 23, 2002
I have no more dirty stories. Well, I have plenty of dirty stories, but no more I feel like telling. At least not right now. It's late. I'm in San Francisco. Gotta drive to San Jose tomorrow. I ran into Anthony Michael Hall at the airport in BC. My second BC star sighting. First was Angelina Jolie. Now AMH. A regular icon of the 80s. Vacation, Sixteen Candles, Weird Science, Breakfast Club. These are staples on TNT. They are the cinematic embodiment of my adolescence. He may be just a B actor these days, but his body of work helped define a decade. So here's to you Farmer Ted! We haven't seen anything you have done in at least ten years, but dammit, we still luv ya.
Jim Parisi
Monday, July 22, 2002
Speaking STILL further of XXX, I just checked the stats on DigitalCatharsis to see the top twenty search engine queries that lead people to my little digital domain. I was a bit surprised at the results. Here is a sample, and I SWEAR this is the truth. Check my site if you want to verify.
27 Jun, Thu, 03:41:47 Google: nubile girls
27 Jun, Thu, 17:10:29 Yahoo: pics of nude flight attendants
27 Jun, Thu, 22:45:52 Yahoo: nude flight attendants
28 Jun, Fri, 10:19:49 Yahoo: peanutbutter sex
30 Jun, Sun, 10:18:17 Google: watch girls naked on web cams for free no need to sing up just free sex and free viewing web cams
30 Jun, Sun, 21:50:10 Yahoo: Naked Mountain Bike Girls
05 Jul, Fri, 23:29:24 Yahoo: meeting with naked girls
06 Jul, Sat, 18:06:45 Google: anal veggie
07 Jul, Sun, 10:27:36 Yahoo: where to buy Rock an Roll Spandex pants
08 Jul, Mon, 16:11:08 Google: naked girls on mountain bikes
10 Jul, Wed, 21:49:23 Google: rikki rachman radio
11 Jul, Thu, 11:13:51 Yahoo: lake travis girls in bikinis
12 Jul, Fri, 16:40:12 Yahoo: Rikki Rachman
15 Jul, Mon, 23:29:47 Yahoo: candle wax naked
16 Jul, Tue, 12:02:33 Google: naked girls on mountain bike
16 Jul, Tue, 18:27:09 Google: rikki rachman
16 Jul, Tue, 20:27:46 Google: Naked Mountain Bike Girls
19 Jul, Fri, 21:48:38 Google: good looking chicks in bikinis
Peanut butter sex? Someone did a search for that?! And found me?! Anal veggie? I'm a vegetarian and that turns even me off. I can think of many better ways to prepare zucchini. Good Lord, here I thought I was putting out a clean, wholesome (OK not TOO wholesome) web site. Four searches for naked mountain bike girls. I've been riding mountain bikes for twelve years, and I gotta tell you, mountain biking probably isn't all that attractive when done naked. Just my opinion, buddy. And three separate searches for Rikki Rachman? I'm just glad no one is looking for Rikki Rachman naked. Personally, the "where to buy rock and roll spandex pants" is my favorite query cause you can never have too many pairs of rock and roll spandex pants. Rock on dudes!
Jim Parisi
Speaking further of XXX, the not-so-mighty-after-all Jimbo, has never visited a strip club. Not even once. This comes as a surprise to most people since most everyone I know (including nearly all of my girlfriends) has been to a club at one point or another. I, however, have not. Honest. Yes, there have been bachelor parties. Yes, I have a penis. No, I don't live in Waco or Salt Lake or anywhere else with a high concentration of people who really, really dig church. I have dated a couple ex-dancers, one nude model, and one ex-dominatrix so does that count for something? So here's the deal: Strip clubs seem really sado-masochistic to me. It's not fantasy - it's torment. It's like going to a restaurant, ordering your favorite item on the menu, then just looking at the food before they take it away. And they take it away WITH your money. This does not seem like a good way to spend an evening. Oooh, let me get turned on by a bunch of hot women so I can go home alone! Boy that sounds like a good time! Wait a minute. That's pretty much what happens every time I go drinking in Huntington Beach only the girls are wearing more clothes. Not much more, but more. Regardless, strip clubs seem like going to a brothel to beat off. And that ain't an economically sound decision. At least with porn, I'm not out fifty bucks for admission, drinks, and a lap dance, and I can flip open the magazine anytime my eyeballs have a hankering for boobies. Besides, there's a lot less recovering-Catholic-adolescence guilt when the exploited, sexually-abused, drug-addicted, female eye-candy that feeds your masturbatory habits is only a bunch of pixels on a screen or ink on a page and not a real flesh and blood human being.
Jim Parisi
Speaking of XXX...There is a sign off the 17 Freeway in Phoenix on the way to Flagstaff. It says: "Live Nudes". Live Nudes. Which is in my opinion a very good thing. The alternative doesn't sound all that appealing as "Dead Nudes" just wouldn't attract the same quality clientele.
Jim Parisi
